Acceptance is the key to freedom. It helps you to stop resisting the present moment. This has been particularly helpful for me, especially in the past few weeks when I haven’t been feeling my best.

I am a lazy girl…

Something that sounds so simple but is so hard to actually do: accepting the things the way they are.

I just came out of a difficult period, where I felt like I had fallen into a rut and was no longer really getting satisfaction from the things I was doing. I lived abroad for quite a while and I was very excited to return to my native country. I felt super excited seeing my friends and family again and getting back to life. Despite the fact that my life in Cape Town went on as usual and I had established my daily routine, I still felt somewhere that my life was on pause. I was looking forward to come back and be able to work on rebuilding my life again.

For the first 2 or 3 weeks I was super motivated and energetic; I actually felt like doing things continuously. I couldn’t find the stop button and just kept going. But after a few weeks this feeling disappeared and I was already getting into a rut. Gee, already in a rut after 3 weeks, I didn’t see that coming.

So here I was: sad, unmotivated, lazy. Yet I continued to do the things I need to do (exercise, work, meetings, stay in touch with others, take good care of myself), because if I’ve learned 1 thing it’s how important it is to persevere. Even when you feel bad. The stakes are high (read: my sobriety).

Accept the unhappiness

I am a big fan of Eckhart Tolle, and I recently listened to a youtube video of his. In it he says the following: be happy with the unhappiness.

” Accepting your unhappiness”

Wow…

I had never looked at it that way before. What if I fully accept that I’m just not doing so well right now? What if I stop resisting those feelings? What if it’s just allowed to be there? What if I can be happy with my unhappiness?

There is a beautiful quote of Tolle which I would like to paraphrase:

“If there is unhappiness in you, first you need to acknowledge that it is there. But don’t say, ‘I’m unhappy.’ Unhappiness has nothing to do with who you are. Say: ‘There is unhappiness in me.’ Then investigate it. A situation you find yourself in may have something to do with it. Action may be required to change the situation or remove yourself from it. If there is nothing you can do, face what is and say, ‘Well, right now, this is how it is. I can either accept it, or make myself miserable.’ 

And this to me is so powerful. If I can be just okay with the fact that I am a little less content right now, it immediately loses its charge for me. Then it’s just a period in my life which is perfectly normal.

In this blog post, I wanted to share these insights with you. You might be going through a phase in your life where things aren’t flowing smoothly or easily. Remember, you are not alone, and it’s okay to feel this way. What I believe is important is to keep moving forward. Continue doing the things you need to do, make a daily plan, and try to stick to it as best as you can. If you need more rest, plan accordingly so you don’t overextend yourself.

I would love to hear your thoughts about this concept, feel free to share them in the comments.

Love, B.