Being sober is BORING. You need to give up all the ”fun things” you used to do. You won’t be able to enjoy your holiday because you won’t have a margarita glued in your hand while enjoying the sun. And, you won’t be able to wind down after a week full of obligations. Sounds like a nightmare, right?
When I first got sober, I was terrified that my life would be over. I mean, my week always went something like this: my Mondays were not so cute: I was tired, some horrible flashbacks of the weekend before came and I would feel ashamed. Tuesday would be a little bit better, by Wednesday I was fully back again. Thursday I got butterflies and Friday afternoon was the moment when I was released from the week and the fun was starting!
Looking back, how boring is THAT? The same routine, no real new experiences or growth. How did I convince myself that numbing out was the definition of fun?
Why Do We Think Sobriety Is Boring?
After doing some research online, I found that these common beliefs are often what lead people to think sobriety is boring.
- We associate drinking/using with the ”fun things”. Without the substances, we will never be able to have fun again.
- We like chaos – that is what some of us brains are used too.
- We struggle to imagine how we’d fill our time or find enjoyment without substances as part of the equation.
- Social anxiety plays a big role too. The thought of being sober at a social event can trigger immediate fear and discomfort.
Stop Focussing On ”What You Don’t Have”
It’s easy to get caught up in the things we’ve given up, but what about what we’ve gained? We as humans tend to focus on the negatives. We always only see what we don’t have instead of what we do have.
I’m definitely guilty of this at times. There are still moments when I catch myself focusing on the things I think I’m missing since I stopped drinking. But if I’m being completely honest, even if I could start drinking again tomorrow, I wouldn’t want to. Now that I’m sober, life feels so much fuller and richer. I’ve formed deep, meaningful connections with people, where I can truly open up. And when I laugh, it’s genuine—it’s real.
But what is perhaps most important to me is that I am finally able to feel: that I can handle life without having to numb myself, and I can enjoy the moments that matter in life.
Boredom Is Normal
Boredom happens when your mind’s need for stimulation isn’t being met. If you regularly flood your body and mind with strong stimulants—like alcohol or drugs—over time, they adapt to that heightened state. This becomes your “normal,” your baseline. When the stimulation stops, your body and mind go into withdrawal, craving that familiar high. If they don’t get it, you’re left with anxiety, discomfort, frustration, and sometimes even fear or pain.
But here’s the good news: if you stick with it, your body and mind will eventually adjust to a lower level of stimulation. The withdrawal symptoms will fade, and what once felt like unbearable boredom will transform into a new kind of normal. Sobriety will no longer feel so dull—it will simply feel like life. And from there, you can start building a life that doesn’t rely on constant stimulation to feel fulfilled.
It Is In Your Hands..
If you don’t take action, nothing will change. Life requires effort.
For a while, I took a step back and thought, “If I just stay sober, everything will fall into place.” And for the first few months, that worked. But eventually, you have to take control of your own path. So get up, and make it happen! The good things in life don’t come to you; you have to go out and get them yourself.
